Dear Marlow

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I  miss you so much, dude. I remember when you were a puppy and you would cry in your crate when we left. I remember the first night you stayed out in the big pen with Max and Ziva. Daddy told me not to leave you, but I knew you could handle it. Of course I rushed home to make sure you did indeed, handle it. Grammy had already rescued you. What a relief. Then there was the gorilla. I really liked that gorilla and yet somehow it became your chew toy! You humped that thing, chewed it, shook it, and even peed on it! You slept in bed with us ever since that first night. I will never forget the look on Zivas face when we she saw you for the first time. You always threw up when we went on car rides. And you drove Max crazy nipping his tail and chasing him. You were such a little fiend. When we moved, you still slept with us. Always at my feet. And growling at me when I tried to move you (you thought you were the king!). All the times you tried to sit on my head while I was on the couch. And sneaking up when you knew you weren’t supposed to get on there. Then there was the time before you were neutered (sorry, dude) and you peed on everything! Including the trashcan. There was the time we took you hiking (tried to) and you hated every minute of it. Including the drive to and from. Also, you tried to bite the vet. I don’t really blame you there because he can be kind of loud. You picked people that you liked. Like Lauren and Jennifer. Such a silly, goofy dog you were. I miss you so much, Mar. I’m writing this and you should be down at my feet and you aren’t. I even heard you bark that night. I knew it sounded too far away but I didn’t call you. I should have called you. I went to the pound and got a new dog. Not to replace you, but because I can’t stand the empty spaces you’ve left behind. This new guy, we named him Jasper. He’s funny and goofy, but he’s not you. I would give anything to give you head scratches and see you looking so serious over everything again. I miss you so much. I’m so sorry I left the gate unlatched. I was thinking the other day that one day you’d fade away in old age, but I never thought you’d get hit by a car at five in the morning. I keep hoping you’ll come home, that I’m dreaming, or crazy, or both. I miss you. I miss you so freakin’ much. I don’t think anyone will understand how much I do. You were my snuggle buddy. Plus you kept my feet warm and I hate that you’re gone. Maybe one day I’ll find another brindle pitbull just like you. One lazy and silly and serious, but even then, you’ll always be my Marlow. I miss you, dude, and I’ll love you always.

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